Monday, March 19, 2012

One on One Time

My mom graciously took Monkey for a day last week, giving me some quality one on one time with Budsy. It was really nice, but it got me thinking about a couple of things. First, I had completely forgotten how boring it is to entertain an infant all day - it's time to haul out the baby toys. And second, it really hit me that I won't have any significant one on one time with Monkey for another 9ish months and it kind of bummed me out.

For 2 1/2 years it was him and me together - day in and day out. The arrival of Budsy changed everything.

I rarely have focused playtime with Monkey anymore. All activities seem to be combined with baby care - nurse the baby while playing trains, burp the baby while reading stories, rock the baby while singing songs. I even front pack the baby during sports class! Budsy is old enough now to be put down for a while, but I'm still splitting my attention between both boys.

Play with Monkey while the baby sleeps, you say? Well, Budsy is a cat napper, which means he only sleeps for about 45 minutes at any given time during the day. One nap is during breakfast, one usually takes place in the car, one is during Monkey's nap, and one final, short nap is usually while I'm attempting to get something that passes for dinner on the table. I can catch about an hour of Mommy-Monkey time between Budsy's bedtime and Monkey's, but it's an exhausting hour for me and I wouldn't necessarily categorize it as quality time.

Part of the problem is that, by choice, I'm exclusively breastfeeding the baby on demand and that means that I have to be available to him 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Even as he gets older and doesn't nurse as frequently, I'll still have to be there for him throughout the day. It will be like that until around Christmas when I'll start to really wean him. I can throw a bottle in there every once, but those of you that have nursed a baby will understand that I can't really miss more than one feeding.

This all adds up to mean that I can only spend limited one on one time with Monkey. I won't get an entire day for more than an entire year. And that really bums me out.

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